At a Crossroad?

Recently in life; especially since going back to work after lockdown, I haven’t felt the happiest that I could have been with my current life choices and I realise that the only person who has the power to change my life path. From this confusion, I sat down and started to think about decision making itself managing to break it down into six different topics.

1 – Realise the power of decisions – First it is best to understand what a decision does, there are a series of chain events and reactions which will be caused from making a decision. Every moment of every day we all make decisions, most are small and inconsequential, but some can be life-altering.

2 – Go with your gut – often, we take way too much time to make a decision as we are worried about the consequences. I am a terrible culprit of this, over thinker alert! The quicker we start to make decisions, the less time we spend in decision paralysis. If you can push past the fear and doubts associated with decision making, you are able to start taking control of your life’s outcomes. Begin to learn your gut and what your instinct is telling you. Your instinct is usually the correct answer for you but more importantly it’s usually the one you truly want to go for. It may be hard to understand at present whilst making the decision but learning to go with your gut makes you a more confident decision maker and mistakes are all an important learning curve.

3 – Carry the decision out – when you make a decision, it is imperative and vital to commit to that decision and to carry out the actions provided to achieve the desired outcome. It is pointless to make a decision but only play out the scenario in your head, this could be seen as the equivalent of mot making a decision at all. If real changes are to be made, the best way I’ve found to achieve this is by creating habits however big or small, this implements the decision made and through repetitive structure you will have so much more confidence to accomplish the main goal of the decision or the next decision.

4 – Talk to others about your decision – Most people will say the same regarding this, telling someone about your goals and ambitions will provide a small amount of pressure or moral obligation to uphold and produce results. This really helps with decisions that require more than just willpower to complete, or talking through life decisions with someone else can help you to understand what you really want to and iron out some of those wrinkles. Will the other people really care or understand your situation? Probably not but most will be happy to lend an ear of provide some advice for your situation, but even the really small changes/decisions; the fact that you have told someone else will give you the motivation to get through.

5 – Learn from your past – When I have ‘failed’ before (using the term fail loosely, as its more about experience and learning) to follow up on the decision I’ve created for myself, I would ask myself “what can I do differently to achieve this next time?” whether that be; Tomorrow, Next Week or Next Year. The true trick is to never get up, sounds cheesy but it is significant to personal development to strive to meet your dreams/targets. No one has ever made a decision and it has gone swimmingly well, there will always be time where it slips or you ‘mess up’ (trust me, we have always been there). Never beat yourself up for this, accept that it has happened and learn from it. Just ask yourself, what went wrong and how can you change this for next time.

6 – And follow a flexible approach – this may sound backwards, but making a decision does not mean that you should cement a specific approach to achieve this. Being open and not stubborn to your decision journey will help you to embrace new knowledge and methods, making you a better-rounded person and will bring you closer to your initial decision.

Due to taking the time to analyse decisions themselves and to write my thoughts down, I have come to my own decision for my immediate life plan and I hope by reading this you will be more settled in your decision making too.

25 Before 25

“Firstly we would like to know a bit about you, introduce yourself”, this is the worst thing I can be asked to do in an interview as I never know what to say. Well, Last month on 23rd August I turned 22, I know I don’t look a day over 16 (I joke, I’m aging faster than I had hoped for). But with this in mind I started to think about the future, which began to scare me a little and I had to ground myself shortly after – but I wanted to have at least a few aims to complete before I hit the next decade of my life. So the ’25 before 25’ list was born:

1 – Move abroad for at least six months – this is probably a big ask over the next three years but it’s always good to have high ambitions for a few things in life, right?

2 – Become a Connoisseur of Tea – something everyone will tell you about me is that I am obsessed with tea, just standard tea (sometimes a redbush or seasonal bag can get used) and I would love to be able to learn more about tea and the tea making process

3 – Cooking Masterclass – I would love to be able to go and learn exactly how to use the utensils in my kitchen and be able to ‘whip up’ something incredible to impress guests with

4 – Go to a really fancy restaurant – following on from the last goal this would be the next best experience, to be able to taste and see what Micheline stars are made of

5 – Let Go of the Past (Stop holding grudges) – use this time to challenge myself in learning from the past but also in turn not letting it define my future, it needs to be left in the past

6 – Admire Myself – Learn to love myself as to quote Ru Paul, “if you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

7 – Be a Part of History – Start standing up for what I believe in and hopefully make a difference however small that may be

8 – Learn Yoga – I feel like this would be very beneficial to my stressful and busy life, with the new yoga mat I asked for my birthday I literally have no excuse now

9 – Be debt free (definitely not student loans) – what I believe to be important is to take as minimal debt as possible to the next stage of life

10 – Go out more in the evenings – since finishing university and starting my mundane 9 to 5, I have become like a hermit and very rarely venture out in the evenings, needing to get out more and see friends/family

11 – Go Skinny Dipping – always something I’ve wanted to do but never found anyone to do it with

12 – Finally run that 5k – something I have always wanted to do, but have found myself too lazy to run or struggling with health

13 – Attempt to break a world record – not sure in what as of yet, probably something unique but I am going to do my research and get practising

14 – Go to a comedy night at a club – stand-up comedy is not really of interest to me but I do like a good comedy film, being a good sarcastic person myself, so it has made the list to blend both worlds together

15 – Volunteer for a good cause – I don’t feel like I give back enough, so I would like to find a cause that I would be able to throw myself into

16 – Learn a Language Thoroughly – I have always been obsessed with other languages but have never been able to force myself to thoroughly learn one

17 – Go and watch F1 racing – I have always wanted to experience the atmosphere of the races and to see the pit stop changes for myself

18 – Travel to the Asian continent – Next on the travel list has to be Japan I think

19 – Get a six pack and do a photoshoot to celebrate – A six pack for me would be when I am healthiest and achieved all my fitness goals

20 – Rough it up and go camping for a weekend – My colleagues and family would describe me as ‘prim and proper’, the idea of camping really worries me, but there’s a first time for everything

21 – Participate in La Tomatina – A festival that both disgusts but really intrigues me, so it’s on the list to step out of my comfort zone

22 – Study a Master’s Degree – there is a lot I would like to achieve in life but I am still unsure on what path to take, these next few years (hopefully with your help) will give me some direction. Well, I hope!

23 – Write a children’s book – or if not a children’s book maybe a regular one

24 – See what life is like as a blonde – Why not?

25 – Create my 30 before 30 list – because goals and ambition is important

Hopefully that helps you get to know me better, giving you a better idea about me and some of my interests. Anything you think I have missed and definitely should achieve by 25? What would you put on yours?